The slant of a headline

The CNN headline yesterday was "Ethnic hatred fuels more Kenya violence", I beg to differ. Fear is what fuels violence. When we are afraid we move into a stance that requires us to do whatever we have to do to survive the situation. Behaviors that are abhorant to us become acceptable when we feel threatend. No matter who we are, or what our values are, when we are threatened, our fear instinct engages us in the need to protect ourselves.

What is really going on?

I don't know the history or full story about what is currently happening in Kenya. I'm not sure that's clear to anyone. But I do know that author and journalist Michela Wrong told Al Jazeera that that the fighting wasn't simply an ethnic split, but was really about the divisions between rich and poor. She is reported to have said: "That's the ugly surface of a much more profound split [but] there is a sense that this was an elitist government, it was a government that was really only interested in itself, in its own particular group."

People in Kenya, it seems are afraid of starving to death. Wouldn't that stir you to action? Fear for our survival is key to our being able to survive. It's a natural, necessary, part of being a mammal, being a human being.

It's easy for us to sit back in our armchairs from our rich country and see this as merely a tribal battle involving long histories of tribal fuedalism, but rarely is that enough to drive human beings to horrific violence. Something immediately dangerous will do that.

How often do we fail to recognize when someone is afraid?

When someone is screaming at us or acting hostilly toward us, what is really going on with them? We don't usually stop to think about this. We usually are frightend ourselves of their behavior and we put up our own defensive barrier to protect ourselves from the perception of their attack. Often, the anger and hostility is not really about us or even aimed at us, yet we do what is instinctive, and we react from our own fear.

Transforming conflict into compassion means being able to recognize the fear behind someone's aparantly irrational, or even violent, behavior. When we can do this, we step outside of our own immediate sense of threat and look at the world through another person's eyes.

This can happen even in radical situations.

Even in the radical world of the pain and horror of Kenya, if the powers that be were willing to negotiate with each other and let go of their own egocentric positions (i.e. self-centered) and step into each other's shoes, change could happen. Knowing how this model affects our selves and our world could "change everything."

Can you do this?

When was the last time you felt someone angry at you or throwing a fit in yoru presence and you thought, "Hmm, this person must be afraid. I wonder what is going on."? Is this a rational way to react when we feel threatened, or is it stupid because the other person, could, perhaps do something to hurt you. What do you think? Comment below and let me know.