I made the mistake a long, long, time ago saying "I love you" to the man who was to become my future husband.  I said it before I really meant it.  I even tried to explain that I didn't know what I meant by it, but it made no difference.  Saying "I love you" to someone you are dating tends to be construed as a kind of commitment.  Some people will use this to their advantage to manipulate others into doing what they want them to do (for example a guy who says it to get someone to have sex with them or a girl who says it to get a diamond ring).  In my case, I knew I felt affection for him, and was excited about our new romance, so when he said "I think I love you" and I said back, "I can say 'I love you, too' but I am not sure what that means." Well that was enough for him and I cared too much about him at that point to change his misperceptions about my fleeting emotions. So be careful when you say it and be careful about how you interpret it.  I'm with D&J when they say it's more important to pay attention to how the person behaves.  Because even though my (now ex) husband said he loved me, his behaviors did not show that, even after we got married.  Its more important that you feel loved than that a person says the words.

I used to be a complete "love addict".  This meant that I focused so entirely on the object of my "love" that I lost complete track of myself.  It would get me into the mos horrible situations. 

But when we get "addicted' to someone else its because we feel lacking in ourselves and only feel better when we are getting our 'fix" of the attentions of this other person.


Then, when you are not around this other person you feel the "withdrawal" symptoms of despair and pain. This is not the pain under your need to be filled up with this other person, this is the addictive focus on the other person which keeps you hooked into the drama so that you can avoid the real issues. Its really painful nonetheless.